To Be Loved
by SeungOppa
Summary: Can Aki really be loved after everything that's happened to him? Doesn't everyone deserve to have some happiness in life?


Author's Note: This is my first time publishing one of my fanfictions, although I've been an active fanfiction reader for quite a long time.. I hope that people will read/review/follow this story, and hopefully there will be more to come. I'm excited to finally be able to show people some of my work, as I usually just keep it to myself.

Warning: This story contains explicit material.. Lemon, as they say in the fanfic universe.. Well I don't want to bore you, so here I go. ~Seung

(Aki's POV)

When I met Ueno, I expected him to be exactly like all the other men my Master brought to me. He would come over, have his fun with me and then leave, just like everyone else I'd ever been intimate with. After all, Master Tatsuya had him come here to petsit a rabbit... it was true that I was treated a lot more like a submissive pet than a human.

There was one thing about him I knew was different, which was that he didn't intend to take advantage of me. All the other men were mostly friends of Tatsuya-sama, or people he hired to fuck me for his entertainment, as he'd always be filming it to use for his own sick pleasure. I don't think how I felt even crossed their mind once in the three years I was involved in this situation.

Ueno was different, though, in so many ways... none of which I could exactly put into words. I was just a stranger he'd found, naked and tied up in the closet, and even though we didn't know each other I let him do whatever he wanted to me. My Master had left that impression in my mind... that I had to do what everyone else wanted, I was just a body meant to be used, meant to be played with like a toy.. I was meant to make others happy and comply with their wishes, no matter how extreme, if not than it would have been better to just kill myself as I would have been living a useless life. Sometimes I did think about committing suicide and even planned it out several times, but I was never able to go through with it. I guess I was just too much of a coward.

Despite all of this, along with the strangeness of the situation, Ueno-kun acted far different than the other unexpected visitors which had become rather common in my life. Unlike anyone else I'd encountered, he actually treated me like a human being rather than an object to use for his personal pleasure. I can remember it all so clearly.. everything he did made me realize something new about myself, something completely different than all the self-hatred my Master had implanted into my head.

Remembering that day.. it was way different from anything I'd experienced before.

"U-Ueno-kun..." I moaned as he stroked my aching member, still inside of me.."You.. you don't have to do anything for me."

He looked at me with a confused expression.. causing me to get off of him and get onto the ground.

I told him, practically begging, "I want you to be inside of me right now.. Please.."

He looked a bit hesitant, but complied, entering me in one powerful thrust. It was painful, but pleasurable at the same time.

After it was all over and done with, I remember how his face showed genuine concern and worry of me. Someone was worrying.. about me of all people? I was just a sex slave, I was worth nothing, I'd been told that more times than I could count and I'd even begun to believe it. Why would he care about the well-being of someone like me?

I was so surprised that he actually.. cared about how I felt, even if it was.. a perverted thought to have. I always heard people call sex "making love," and people (mostly girls) would always go on and on about how special sex was, how it showed a connection between two people who love each other and care through their bodies. That was never the sex I knew, in which no one really even cared whether I was enjoying it or not of if I even wanted them to be doing that.

It made me happy to know that someone actually acknowledged me as a human being, more happy than one can imagine, as it was a very very rare thing.

I remember coming to Master every day, how hard he made every minute of my life, even when we weren't together. When he wasn't invading my body, he was invading my mind through intrusive and disturbing thoughts, flashbacks of the more violent acts he would commit.

I wonder.. was I a whore for doing the things he asked? Did it count as my choice..?

If I didn't do everything he wanted me to, there was always a threat of being hurt physically.

"Welcome home, Aki-chan." Master said to me with a smirk on his face, "I haven't seen you for a little while, you've made me feel lonely. You'd better repay me for this cruelty, won't you, little whore?"

"I-I don't know.. maybe not right now, okay?" I tried to get out of it. He was always so rough with me, and I was already feeling tired. After he was done with me I'd hardly be able to walk or sit comfortablely for the next few days!

"That's funny, Aki-chan, you think you have some kind of choice don't you?" he laughed sadistically.

"Well, just because you're my master doesn't mean you have complete control over-"

"Shut your mouth, you fucking whore!" he slapped me hard across the face, leaving a red imprint, "You do what I say when I say it, you understand?"

I simply nodded, knowing that if I protested anymore I'd be seriously beaten and could end up in the hospital, if he'd even take me me. I was a regular there, always coming up with creative excuses as to why I was always getting injured, telling them I was getting in fights. I hoped they wouldn't be able to tell that these were.. the result of sexual attacks, I suppose.

The rest of the night was spent with his cold hands leaving scars all over my body, violating me everywhere. Something I'd experience regularly, something I'd gotten used to by now... Somehow this had become all too regular for me.

I could only dream of loving someone and having them love me back, not just for my body but for me as a person.

I never thought I , a dirty, disgusting whore, would be able to be loved by someone.

Why would someone want a used toy?

To be continued


End file.
